i keep having dreams where i am swallowing your spit

last night
we decided to get back together
or you decided
and i forgot to tell you how i really feel
and so

and your body has changed around
and every time i swallow hard it’s your spit that
goes down my throat
and i want to wake up
so i can be glad i live in the future where we
stayed apart
awake so i can look you up on instagram
and see you’re really not as ugly now as you were
last night
and maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to taste your spit again

my dreams
they teach me lessons i am glad to learn
i guess
but they keep putting your name in my head
when i am close to forgetting
and forgetting would almost be better
than the remembering that comes with the lesson